Dear Montana - Andrea Martin, EW YCL

Dear Montana,

I want to preface this note with the request that you please, please stop snowing. It is May. In my home state of Oregon it is most likely raining, but I'm sure I wouldn't need to scrape my windshield at 9am.

That said, I am grateful for the fact that you are always unpredictable, as well as those (rare) gorgeous days when your big blue sky seems to take over everything. It is those moments when I am so, so thankful that I decided to be poor with few possessions in Billings. There are of course the moments when the wind gusts reach 60 mph, and I wake up to snow and ice and the promise of 10 days of tech training and freezing in my tent. Oh, Montana. In addition to keeping me on my toes weather-wise, my last 2 months with you have taught me a lot.

1.) Everything Is a Matter of Expectations.
On my first "hitch" with my fellow Youth Crew Leaders in Pompey's Pillar, we were all a little disappointed when our week-long planting project became 1.25 days of planting before running out of plants, and then became, in order, picking up sticks (no joke) installing plastic protective "fences" around our small plants (in time for a huge windstorm that most likely blew them all away...) and then sanding and weatherizing the boardwalk up to the top of the pillar. Eight straight hours of sanding a handrail is even less exciting than it sounds.
However, when you work with incredible, motivated, hard working, fun loving people (which I currently do) nothing is ever so bad. The Eastern Wildlands Youth Crew Leaders came out of a pretty dull project feeling proud of our efforts of give our all (and more) to an unfortunate situation. I suppose always having the expectation to work hard and have fun no matter what will never leave you disappointed.

2.) Acting Like a Child Is Sometimes All it Takes.
While undergoing multiple trainings, discussion about literally everything, challenging partnerships, as well as that feeling that no matter what you'll never really be prepared for the summer, it can be difficult to keep a sense of humor or even your eyes open without 7 cups of coffee. Thank you Americorps, MCC, and whoever and whatever else decided that playing incredibly childish games would be good for people's energy level. I would add that they are good for the soul.
Back in Pompey's Pillar, while waiting for our sponsor in the frigid morning hours, The Greater Yellowstone YCLs introduced my fellow EW YCLs to a new game called Warrior. It may be entirely impossible to explain the game, which involves pretending to be a ninja and screaming like an idiot, but I can say that I have never laughed to hard in my life.

3.) The Hardest Work Can Be Entirely In Your Own Head
Last week, the last week of April, all of MCCs YCLs met up for the second time at Camp Mak-A-Dream to do more leadership training, as well as meet Wild Bill and Lady Louise for 2 days of Wilderness First Aid. While going through leadership training, we discussed teaching styles, dynamics of group development and conflict resolution styles. We also had the opportunity to talk A LOT with our co-leaders about all of these things. During our talks, I got the feeling that all of my styles of doing everything were viewed as the wrong way of acting.
At the end of the week, I simply couldn't discuss what I viewed as "how much I suck at my MCC life" and was exhausted and frustrated. Of course, my frustration with talking, begot more talking, where my co and SYCL were able to point out how much my own insecurities about my styles were coloring my perception of others.
After working with difficult teens in partnerships, doing projects in the snow, wind and rain, and driving from Oregon to Montana in 1 day, I can say the most challenging week of MCC was at Camp Mak-A-Dream, inside my own head.

4.) Food Shopping in Super Wal-Mart Will Make You or Break You
I try not to frequent Wal Mart for multiple reasons, not least of which is that it is always the most crowded place in the entire world. For our Pompey's Pillar hitch, our SYCL, Bre, set us four YCLs loose with $200+ to buy food for the week. We had our list, as well as a calculator, but we had no idea what we were doing. We had unknowingly stepped into the perfect storm of Wal Mart shopping. Not only was it a Saturday, but it was also the first Saturday of April, meaning everyone in the entire city of Billings, MT had just been paid/received food stamps and were out in droves. It took us 10 minutes to find a parking spot in the very back of the massive lot. We then spent the next 2 hours negotiating shopping cart traffic in the store. I have found Montana and Billings to be pretty friendly places, but in Wal Mart it was eat or be eaten. We had to push our way through crowds to get the salsa, canned beans, pasta sauce and goldfish crackers we desperately needed. While pushing the cart I proceeded to have a mini breakdown, Dylan, my co, accidentally cleared the calculator screen, and had a breakdown of his own, Chris, unable to handle the pressure, disappeared for about 10 minutes and came back eating a donut. Alisa was the only one who kept her mental health in check until we reached the check out, loaded up approximately 29 bags of food, and headed out to the rig. With frayed nerves, we all agreed that we were eternally grateful we didn't have to do that alone.

5.) There is Always Room.
Room to improve, room in your day pack for one more thing, room in your stomach for that last scoop of pasta, room on top of the rig to fit 3 wheelbarrows, a chainsaw and dolmar, 7 metal rakes, 8 mcleods, 5 shovels, and 10 pairs of lapers. My spatial reasoning skills need a little work. I still do not have the ability to comprehend how 8 people and their gear, 4 weeks of food, tools for 4 weeks of projects and a positive attitude can fit into one Suburban. Montana, I guess you still have a lot more to teach me. Bring it on.